Sunday, June 5, 2011

Happy Freaking Birthday: Part Six.

Mystery told me about her encounter with Wildman, Victor, and the Executor. I was glad to see her unharmed and hear that Shadowchild too was well. It meant a lot to know she came all this way then to try and find me, even after everything at home. Listening to her was a comfort all its own, to be able to hear a voice I trusted. So few there are I can say such to. My hands stopped their nervous shaking, calmed; we switched to discussing plans on what we were to do. It was chosen this place would be our "bat lair", or base of operations. I nearly cackled, sarcastically, at how long it was going to take to get this place up and running. Working out a power source especially, solar perhaps? Checking out the floors beams and the likes would be wise to help secure the levels. On top of that a ladder or rope ladder would work on the trees that have grown tall within the building itself. The roof was nearly gone which provided enough life during the day and a decent amount during the night, so I found out that evening. The third level was pretty much non-existent, the second floor was together a fair amount. Those are pretty much the basics of what I'd like to see done immediately. Mystery knows this, and has her own say. Either way, it's a project I look forward to working on... After I get some sleep and fixed up.

This place is amazing, though. Better than the fort I found a while back. Not to mention it was within walking distance as well, figuring out the fastest route via map would be simple enough. Walking the terrain once the leg was a bit better would help too. I walked the perimeter outside already a few times, glancing out into the woods surrounding the building. Vaguely wondering how near Prosper was willing to get, I could see the disturbing mask within my mind peering through the trees to my position. Paranoia, I had control over my own, tamed it well and would have to again now that I have lost some control of it. One more glance and I decided it would be alright, Mystery's method of being warned should do well enough should Prosper want to play up close.

I went back into our sanctuary and slid down the slope in the floor to where Sunshine was. Chained in the chains taken from the garage, ones my father used to use when working or found on this old farmland. Shackles were my finding and I snatched them as well before we came here. Useful they are, we would have to see when he woke up, though.

I eased myself at the bottom of the slope and looked to his form laying curled on his side. This man I knew to be vicious, that committed criminal acts during my times of rest and taunted me with personal tokens when awake now laid sleeping. His chest puffing and deflating slowly within his deep sleep. A filthy and lightly scarred face retaining some boyish similarities like from the childhood memories.

Kill him before he kills you.

I thinned my gaze upon his figure; he was completely unaware of these thoughts.
Kill him, for everything he's done. Can do. It nagged at me strongly, the simplicity of just snapping his neck.

He tried to kill you as a child.
He betrayed you already.

Wasn't that just because I couldn't save him? I bit back with doubt.

You were a child, what could you have done?
Puffed out your lower lip and hope He'd return the boy?


You ran.
You chased.
We failed.

The whys still are sitting there, unknown. Too many holes. Too many variables. I want answers and you won't give them.

Kill him before he kills you.
That is my answer.

I felt a heavy scowl weighing down my lips, like hell I would accept that. I watched as Mr. Sunshine's face contorted into something negative. Did he dream, and if so, does that mean he had nightmares too still? I scooted over closer to examine him and found his body shivering lightly despite the warm night air. Tempted to leave I instead stayed, hesitantly reaching out a hand to pet the shaved dirty blonde head. The shivering began to slow the longer I remained sitting near him, lightly comforting. Maybe there would be more reason to call him Mr. Sunshine, perhaps it wasn't just a sarcastic title given because of the gloomy setting he weaved in his previous visits. Seeing him then I could see the innocence, that of a child trapped beneath years of corruption and suffering. The sun was still peeking through the thick clouds.

Perhaps shit was going to get a bit better. Hell, if he could retain that I still have some hope. Whatever the fuck I am or was may still have hope, for a better tomorrow. I smiled lightly, if not without a tug to the heart strings. I hummed quietly "You Are My Sunshine" the way I grew up with it, refusing to allow the Executor to take such a memory from me. My sleeping companion stilled, calm and I felt as his fingers pinched my tattered pajama bottoms within a light hold. I had a fail voice for singing, but humming at least I got down decently, I guess. Or maybe he just remembered it, eh? Kindred souls we were. He probably remembered and knew more than I of our past. I hoped that when he woke up later there would be no hard feelings about Mystery knocking him one, and if he could speak I damn well prayed he had something to say about what the hell happened all that time ago.

I honestly had no idea whether or not he was a danger. He ripped apart the front of my doppelganger. I would like to think it was because he knew she wasn't the real me, but the paranoia of maybe he was just ready to kill me still comes into play. Does this hinder the fact I am going to protect his life as if it were Mystery's or my kin's, as if it were those I fight for? No. He's just as precious. I've seen a gem covered by coal once before, unable to shine against the rays of the sun. I see Mr. Sunshine and he might be just like that, only he might be finally peeking through the layers of coal. He may have finally begun breaching the surface.

We can only hope he's trying to regain something he lost, the control. I just don't know how I would proceed if his death was the only conclusion. There is this bond, you see, which is so fucking hard to describe... But it is just there. I don't talk about that lover shit, I'm not much of an expert there, heh. I mean, that feeling that you're familiar with something that it becomes this strong connection, you must have it with you. That of a girl who lost her memories, perhaps her mind in the past, and can still feel those connections without any given idea as to why they are there. But they are, and they are strong, and she knows she has to protect them and figure out why... Just why. And maybe then things will be a little better, a little more whole. Then again... No one is ever whole, are they? No one is ever whole until they are dead. But she doesn't need to be whole; she just needs to be close enough, right? I just need to be close enough. So I look to Mr. Sunshine and feel this connection, from a friendship that was strong enough to withstand a jump in time with him first taken to when he tried to drown me. And I think... Hell dude, if you die on me I'm going to be sad, but I'm not going to quit moving forward. But I would have to go through this entire thing feeling hollow and vacant, and that wouldn't get me very far. It wouldn't get me far at all. So... I'm going to protect him, even if others think I'm crazy, even if he is vicious still when he wakes up. It's not going to be easy but that's fine, I don't like easy. I don't need to feel like a winner in a world you literally can't win in.

So for the night I stayed, ended up falling asleep back against the slope because I sure as hell still wasn't going to nearby him in a state of vulnerability. Variables, my friends, too many. Mystery came round in the morning and shooed me home, I cleaned up and returned with food and a sketch pad to figure out what the hell kind of changes we were going to start making. Sunshine was still out, which was good. I think he was entitled to a rest within a safe environment.

Here is to meeting in the flesh a woman I consider kin, and here is to reuniting with a friend I can barely remember. To keeping him safe and the rest of our asses. Honestly, I think shit is just getting started. So... Leg, body in general, heal up fast because if you think that road getting here was bumpy you've got another thing coming, heh.

Stay safe, darlings,

If she wants to walk into hell let her.
She may have forgotten but we remember.
We remember everything.

No comments:

Post a Comment